Thursday, October 27, 2005

Don't you dare...

Don't ever call me a nerd. Wow this almost beats the Star Wars opera over MA way. Scary, but geeks need hobbies too I guess.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Five alt names for things Catholic

With respect to Merlin's 5ives, I had a near epiphany with these:

1. Our Lady Of Confidence Men
2. The Holy Sisters Of Mercenary
3. Holy Father of the Incumbancy
4. The Blessed Virgin of Hollywood
5. Saint Bono's World of Salvation

Monday, October 10, 2005

California Non-Official Voter Info Guide

Tuesday, November 8th in the year of our Lord two thousand and five. Yet another reason to abandon direct injection democracy. I'm sick of running into signature hunters at the grocery stores, post office, whatnot telling me about impending doom if I don't sign their petition and get out and vote. So here's my info guide to the next election's propositions:

#73 - Returning control of a minor's life to the parent.

Pro's: Like it or not, they gave birth to your dumb ass and put up with years of crap and control issues, not forgetting they paid your way the whole time. Time to face the music, you're preggers and your parents have a say in the situation.

Con's: Your parents are nightmares from hell and there is no way in hell they will give you any consolation in this time of need. The beating that will ensue will likely terminate the pregnancy. Run for your life and that of your unborn.

How to vote: Use your heart to vote for or against this measure, if you do not possess such an emotion, do not vote. I'll be performing the latter motion.

#74 - Returning control of a teacher's life to the taxpayer.

Pro's: Limits the power of the ever powerful teacher's union to pre-1960's status. Love 'em or hate 'em, unions are here to stay and take over, so let's kick 'em where it counts and hope the kids test scores inprove.

Con's: Another attempt at controlling something they don't understand and then refuse to take responsibility for their kids poor learning skills. We have to put up with their children's bad behaviour and then they want to punish us again?

How to vote: Got kids? Consider home schooling and vote any which way the wind blows. No kids and a home owner? Vote however you think it'll affect your property tax bill on down the line.

#75 - Control of union dues - I thought Communication Workers v. Beck straightened this one out.

Pro's: Returns worker's control over unions.

Con's: None that are tangible.

How to vote: Vote yes if a union member and don't vote on it if not.

#76 - Further obfuscation of State budgetary spending, funding and limits on both for education.

Pro's: Can't see any

Con's Don't know of any

How to vote: Don't, it's that simple. No one has ever figured out the hows and whys of governmental budgets, so any attempts to reign in spending and such are a fool's game. Easy fix, print more money.

#77 - Stopping the congressional district edge bleed.

Pro's: Provide further gridlock, which will in turn mean less bills and such ever become laws.

Con's: Good god, who knows...

How to vote: With your heart of course.

#78 - Cheap meds for hypocondriacs.

Pro's: Now grandma can afford those new implants.

Con's: So can grandpa.

How to Vote: Remember ultimately you're picking up the bill.

#79 - Same as above, only worded differently.

#80 - Electric supply regulation.

Pro's: None, they screwed the pooch on deregulation, what makes you think they can right that wrong?

Con's: See above.

How to vote: Who pays the bills, if you don't then leave it blank. If you do, then play Russian roulette.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Gee Whiz, and now what...

So Mike Davis has gone and blown my mind once again. In addition to this torrid post, he's spying another holocaust with regards to the budding avian flu contagion happening over 'Nam way.

Hmmm let's see now (and not in any particular order...), global warming/Arctic ice melt, Islamic terrorism, avian flu outbreak, impending housing bubble implosion, rising gas prices, China rising, Dollar sinking, getting older and losing functionality... Oh wait one good thing, my penis stills works like it always did! Bring on the grrls and leave the inhibitions at the door with the midget...

Wow, love those spam comments - keep 'em coming!

I'd read about this, but now I see it for realsies. Industrious, better than an inbox full of penis enlarging tips and cheap meds!

Friday, October 07, 2005

Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but...

I applaud Trent Reznor for providing budding musicians and pros alike with several songs in an multi-track, editable format. I missed the first download, but jumped on the second thinking of the possibilities and such. So I registered and looked forward to having fun with actual music tracks in GarageBand.

Boy was I disappointed.

Sure it's a song as far as songs go, and it is editable (to a degree), but wow what a laaamme song. Now I'm no NIN fan and couldn't tell you one tune from TR and crew, so I have no idee what kind of tunesmith TR is, and well it's obvious he's a creative gent and all but this offering seems to be pure fodder.

Sorry bro, but the feigned angst and thin premise of a concept coupled with a few cheap "Only fucking you"s thrown in (come on...) on top of a dull melody really put me off doing much more than adding cavernous reverb, distortion to several instruments and voice and generally forgetting about the whole thing. The high points were the opening bars of the piano/drums/synth and the ending note.